You opened your social media account and saw the post of someone displaying his happy love life. Given that you’re single and have been looking for that special someone for a long time, you started comparing yourself to others who already found the one. This happens whenever you open the app and see similar posts. Thus, you end up having a negative self-talk. This gives birth to other thoughts about different aspects of your life that you think are less in value compared to others’. Instead of being thankful for what you have, you tend to notice the things you don’t have. It will be a cycle if you don’t pay attention to this bad habit and make ways to change your mindset. Also, your bitterness can have a ripple effect on your loved ones. So, take heed of these tips to avoid this vicious cycle.
1. Pay attention to your thoughts
Pushing your negative thoughts away whenever you see posts that trigger your insecurity is not a radical solution. It’s because the same thought will be triggered again when you see another post that’s similar in nature with what you already saw. To overcome this, you need to go down to the root cause of your issue. Where are these negative thoughts coming from? Your insecurity of seeing someone else achieving the things you set for yourself is caused by your wrong perspective. So instead of being envious, be inspired by others’ accomplishment. This allows you to take action and be able to move forward.
2. Have a purpose
You can’t control other people’s motive but you can control your own. If you keep on complaining by posting your life issues on social media, then you need to check yourself. But if you set your purpose, you will be wise on what not to post. Though you are not there to please people, you still need to be civil enough for the sake of your own dignity. This social media habit is good both for your personal and professional life. If your purpose is to inspire, educate, or entertain people through your posts, this will also create positive vibes within you. That way, you will be able to stop feeding your bitterness.
3. Manage your expectation
As you open your social media profile, what is your expectation? Remember not to expect other people to post something significant to you. They are not there to please you anyway. Therefore, there’s nothing wrong if they are proud of their achievements. Understand that everyone has that right. So when opening your app, expect to see posts like that. Managing your expectation helps you accept things as they are.
4. Focus on your own actions
Your insecurity might be coming from your unwillingness to deal with your own issues. You should accept the things you cannot change. Just appreciate your uniqueness and compliment other people. This practice will help you become content with yourself. On the other hand, you need to do something for the things you can change. If you are overweight for example, seeing others in a good shape should redirect you into thinking about your habits. If the cause is your unhealthy lifestyle, then it’s time to change. This is not to please other people. But this is for you be healthy. So instead of comparing your life to others’, focus on improving what actually matters. That’s how you grow into maturity.
Comparing yourself to others who are ahead of you can cause you to either hate those people or pity yourself. Both will lead to self-destruction. The fact is that there will always be someone who is better than you in some things. Therefore, you will never run out of things which you can be insecure about. That is, if you don’t have a healthy perspective. You don’t have to compete. Don’t adopt someone else’s measuring stick. You are you. No one can have your unique set of characteristics. Thus, learn to embrace it and live your life on purpose.
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